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“How did the date go?” asked David, trying to sound upbeat as she slipped in the front door.“You could say it was not my dream date.”“Hey, h... didn’t... ?”“No, it never got that far. Let’s just say there won’t be a second date with Mr. Tom Brulinger,” she said sitting on the couch beside him.“I’m sorry,” ... he replied, then looked into her eyes, “ ... sort of. You deserve better.”“Well, if Mr. right is out there, he seems to be hiding pretty well.”“Maybe you’re just not looking in the right. But how do I talk to Kristin about this?”“One word at a time, with appropriate pauses and inflections to indicate punctuation.”“Ha, ha! Very funny!”“I’m actually serious. Just talk with her.”“And say what? ‘Hey, sorry about taking your virginity without understanding what it might mean.’?”“Don’t be daft! If you DO want to hurt her, that would be a great way to do it! Do NOT start with an apology!”“What about something along the lines of saying we should have talked first?”“Try just asking her. The pendant hung from the waist of my knickers. She took the pendant and released it from the clip and she threw it to the chair.‘Undo the other clamp.’I pulled aside the crotch of my knickers and unclipped it, feeling the burning return of blood to my lip. A small moan escaped my lips and she leant to kiss me.‘A little pain, so very little. So much to learn. Take off your knickers.’I did so.I stood straighter and she kissed me again. This time her nipples pressed hard into my skin. She is. I didn't care.Shit. Jenny must be right. I am a closed book. So if that's the problem, the obvious solution is let myself open up. To get beyond the simple expedient of being 'the boyfriend' and allowing them to see the real me, which is terrifying to contemplate.Why was that such a scary thought? Fear of rejection? Well, I should be used to that by now. Except, I always took comfort in the idea that they weren't really rejecting me, because they didn't really know the 'real' me. They were.
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