" I don't envy your eternal life," I said quietly."Purgatory, my young friend," he grinned sadly.By the end of Tuesday's rehearsal I felt as good as I...ever had about my play and about the work I was doing on Lindy's play. During our lunchtime meeting of the smaller intra group of collaborators adjusting our plays I saw Lindy had been right about that first revision she felt my play needed being the worst. The other problems turned out to be small adjustments; a bit of tightening or rewriting. Ja, ich bin eine Spielerin. Ich benutze ein Diaphragma zur Empfängnisverhütung. Das heißt, ich fühle einen Mann nackt in mir, Fleisch auf Fleisch, und spüre sein Sperma in meiner Muschi. Es bedeutet, dass ich auch ein Risiko für sexuell übertragbare Krankheiten eingehe, aber ein Penis in einem Kondom ist einfach nicht dasselbe wie ein nackter Fick, ich muss es ohne haben. Ich werde regelmäßig getestet, aber es ist wahrscheinlich nur eine Frage der Zeit, bis ich mir etwas hole. Und das ist noch. I touched the prom queen! I wiped her eyes! She talked to me! I saw her close up without fainting or her noticing my boner! Wow, I was having a major buzz about all this. She was stunningly beautiful. Perfect skin, hair, lips, and everything else I might have left out. Nice big tits, hips and ass that were&hellip,fucking perfect. I floated home and was in a dream world thinking about her. My sister asked me what I was so happy about. I told her. She said: Big deal, shell never give you a second. A confident woman doesn't look back at me; I hope I will find her tonight. Negative thoughts invade my headspace. It is terrifying venturing out among the couples alone. What if no one wants me? creeps into my head. Now, stop! Shake it off!I am desirable.I am sexy.I can do this.I repeat these words over and over while staring into the mirror willing these words to become true. Then, I turn and walk out the door.The walk down the hallway to the staircase feels like a million miles long. I reach.
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