I hadn’t realized that it was so bad that he needed to see a psychiatrist – lots of psychiatrists. For the longest time, I thought his constant re...ection of my hugs was something to do with me. It had built up this huge seething hurt way down deep inside of me. I was convinced that he didn’t love me enough to hug me. Slowly, very slowly, I realized that it wasn’t about me. What Dad had written more or less confirmed that.It was weird to read Dad’s description of me. It made me feel strange in. Even the parking lot was deserted. Emma was standing with her back to the cinderblock wall, not knowing where to put her eyes. "Darkness stirs my soul," I quoted. "Desires whose name I cannot speak. His flesh is within me, his raging lust upon me. I am his anger and his joy, his sickness and its cure. He shames me with my pleasure and tames me with his rage, till all dissolves between us and he sees me as I am." "Who wrote that?" she asked nervously. I ignored her question. "Is that how. Classes and part-time jobs have been running you into the ground, but it's Friday night now and you have the weekend off. Part of you wants to get out to some parties and meet some girls, but you are so exhausted you can't bring yourself to do more than collapse on the couch and watch some late-night movies.You mentally chastise yourself for not going through the effort of going out to try and woo some of the other college juniors. You haven't had any sex since you and Gia split and that was. In fact once or twice we have all sat down to watch TV together completely naked. It felt very natural and normal. So why can’t it be natural and normal to be naked at work?”Stacey flicked her dark hair nervously. She didn’t really know what to do or think then she blurted out, “Tell you what ... let’s all strip off now then all three off us should wave to Mrs Maxwell through her window and see if she reacts. We have had naked girls from BSC in here before and Mrs Maxwell didn’t mind that so.
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